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 Write to the council

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Daz
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PostSubject: Write to the council    Fri Dec 07, 2018 2:08 pm

Only in Britain -Complaints to Councils
Extracts from letters written by council tenants:

1. It's the dogs mess that I find hard to swallow.

2. I want some repairs done to my cooker as it has backfired and burnt my knob off.

3. I wish to complain that my father twisted his ankle very badly when he put his foot in the hole in his back passage.

4. Their 18 year old son is continually banging his balls against my fence.

5. I wish to report that tiles are missing from the outside toilet roof. I think it was bad wind the other day that blew them off.

6. My lavatory seat is cracked, where do I stand?

7. I am writing on behalf of my sink, which is coming away from the wall.

8. Will you please send someone to mend the garden path. My wife tripped and fell on it yesterday and now she is pregnant.

9. I request permission to remove my drawers in the kitchen.

10. 50% of the walls are damp, 50% have crumbling plaster, and 50% are just plain filthy.

11. The next door neighbour has got this huge tool that vibrates the whole house and I just can't take it anymore.

12. The toilet is blocked and we cannot bath the children until it is cleared.

13. Will you please send a man to look at my water, it is a funny colour and not fit to drink.

14. Our lavatory seat is broken in half and now is in three pieces.

15. I want to complain about the farmer across the road. Every morning at 6am his cock wakes me up and it's now getting too much for me.

16. The man next door has a large erection in the back garden, which is unsightly and dangerous.

17. Our kitchen floor is damp. We have two children and would like a third, so please send someone round to do something about it.

18. I am a single woman living in a downstairs flat and would you please do something about the noise made by the man on top of me every night.

19. Please send a man with the right tool to finish the job and satisfy my wife..

20. I have had the clerk of works down on the floor six times but I still have no satisfaction.

21. This is to let you know that our lavatory seat is broke and we can't get BBC2.

22. My bush is really overgrown round the front and my back passage has fungus growing in it.
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Boosey
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PostSubject: Re: Write to the council    Fri Dec 07, 2018 3:12 pm

Laughing
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fieldwalker
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PostSubject: Re: Write to the council    Fri Dec 07, 2018 7:28 pm

lol! sound like some of knackereds complaints....do they have councils in oz Wink
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Knackered
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PostSubject: Re: Write to the council    Fri Dec 07, 2018 10:41 pm

fieldwalker wrote:
lol! sound like some of knackereds complaints....do they have councils in oz Wink
Steady on lol! lol! lol! Rolling Eyes Rolling Eyes show some respect etc please FW Wink Wink Knackered lives, now Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad in little China town Rolling Eyes Rolling Eyes I have that many high rise buildings going up with the blessing of my local council as such here. Forget about bounce bounce  crap roads/footpaths/rubbish Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad just let the peasant types suffer lol! lol! lol! as we have to find 70 odd million dollars by the bean counter types there now for a new convention centre, that 1% of the peasant local types will ever use as such. Society Rolling Eyes Rolling Eyes Rotten Wink Wink Big time, at the highest level Wink Wink Rotten in the middle Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad & rotten at a local level Smile Smile, Thankfully thou Smile Smile I still have my little green belt type area here, where I can escape too fortunately Wink Wink. cheers
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fieldwalker
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PostSubject: Re: Write to the council    Sat Dec 08, 2018 2:18 am

Pleased you can still find sanctuary knackered lol!
Here in the motherland we are running out of room queen
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Knackered
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PostSubject: Re: Write to the council    Sat Dec 08, 2018 8:50 am

fieldwalker wrote:
Pleased you can still find sanctuary knackered lol!
Here in the motherland we are running out of room queen
Could be heading the same way here FW etc Wink Wink I suspect. Been listening to music from my new neighbour here  today Rolling Eyes Rolling Eyes all Chinese music Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad Crying or Very sad I'm affraid Smile Smile. Oh for the days bounce bounce of the Supremes as such Smile Smile or even old Elvis Wink Wink on a good day.  cheers
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